Questions to Ask on a Date

My name is Jared; I’m 40 (at the time of writing this) and happily married… finally. But I’ve also been on a lot of dates in my time and in the later years they were all dates from online dating sites. Of course I learned over time what questions to ask on a date or better yet, 1000 questions for couples. Obviously these questions will be different for women then they are for men so I’ll fill you in on all the great questions men should be asking below, but first (in case you’re about to go on a date) I’ll let my wife Emily list some great advice for women on questions to ask guys on dates:

For WOMEN:

  • Do you pray or believe in God?
  • Do you have or want children?
  • Are you divorced or ever been married?
  • How do you get along with spouse our ex?
  • What do you prefer, summer or winter?
  • What is your favorite vacation place?
  • Have ever been convicted of a crime or felony?
  • Have you ever had a restraining order?
  • Any STD’s?
  • Are you a sports fan?
  • Do you drive a truck?

That’s my wife’s quick list of questions based on her past dating experiences. These are by no means comprehensive or right for everyone. The key is to think, what’s important to you? And how important are those traits and qualities in someone else?

Another small peace of advice here… Get rid of the list of your perfect mate. Seriously, if you think someone else is going to have everything on your list and make you happy, then you’re never going to find that perfect someone.

Granted, I think I found the perfect person for me in my wife Emily, but then I found love and acceptance for self first (as did she) and then we found each other. Seriously, if you’re looking for someone else to make you happy, it’s never going to happen. You need to be happy with yourself first. But, at the same time, it’s OK to sent boundaries and know what you want in a partner. As my wife always tells her friends when asked about relationship questions and advice, “you set the rules for how others treat you.”

First and foremost, the best quality to look for in a partner, again, something I learned from my father-in-law after meeting my wife: find someone kind. I know, it seems simple but kindness isn’t always that hard to find. Which brings up the idea of putting together some questions that help you determine indirectly if the person you’re dating or thinking of dating is kind. Some of which can be found in 1000 Questions For Couples.

For MEN:

Before I get into the questions you should ask on your next date… which maybe it’s in 30 minutes! If so I’d better get to it right? I first want to fill you in on an important secret I wish I’d known about say… 100 dates ago!

This may save you some time and heartache; I know it would have saved me all of that plus a ton of money on dates that went nowhere! What I realize now is most of the questions I asked were wrong, and should have come straight from a relationship expert like Michael Webb, author and creator of 1000 Questions For Couples. Had I known all the right questions explained by Michael, I could have saved a lot of time and a TON of money on worthless dates and relationships that went nowhere.

Here’s just one simple tip that Michael suggests:

“Just because you like the same types of foods and pets does not mean that you can have a blissful, long-term relationship.”

“An estimated 83% of divorces would not take place if couples asked each other the right questions” – and that can start with the first date!

To put into perspective the types of questions I asked, the night before I met my wife Emily I went out on the date from hell. It started off with a nice dinner but I pretty much could tell right off the bat there wasn’t any chemistry. Besides asking the right questions, you really should meet in person as soon as possible.

Here’s a list of questions I asked and her response:

  • Question: If you could go anywhere in the world, where would that be?
    • Her Answer: Las Vegas
      • yes, that’s right, she said Las Vegas. Now, I’m not saying Vegas isn’t a bad place to visit or someones “dream” vacation, let’s just say I was looking for something a little more inspirational.
  • Question: What do you like to do for fun or what hobbies do you have?
    • Her Answer: hanging out and drinking

Granted I was looking for a little more than that. Now, here is where the whole online dating things come into play. VERY IMPORTANT TIP FOR ONLINE DATING!

MEET IN PERSON ASAP.

Just as important is the topic of being safe! NEVER, under any circumstances meet someone you’ve just met online other than a very public place. I’m not talking about “hooking up” as soon as possible here, we’re just talking about meeting for coffee or better yet, lunch somewhere very safe and public.

The reason why lunch is such a good idea is it’s time constrained. Meaning, if you only have so much time for lunch if the date sucks and there’s no chemistry you have an acceptable and legitimate out!

Deep Questions to Ask Your Boyfriend

deep questions to ask a guyIn today’s society, marriage and relationships are not as lasting as they used to be. It is important to really know the person you are dating and to know that  both you and your partner are interested in the same goal. Communication breakdown between two people is one of the main reasons that people break up. Before moving too far into a relationship, you should know what deep questions to ask your boyfriend or deep questions to ask a guy in general.

Romance or Love?

Because marriage is a continuous decision, one will need to remember that love is not dependent upon feelings, so you need to be aware of how your guy feels about you. There are a few questions you can ask of your significant other to learn where you are at in your relationship.

  • In what areas of your relationship does your significant other have to choose to love you because it does not come easily?
  • What are some of the ways that you and your significant other alike and how are you different?
  • Do these differences or similarities play a part in experiencing true joy and love in the relationship?

Who Is He?

Just because your world lights up when you are with someone, it doesn’t mean it always will. Things that help a relationship become solid and lasting are things that you firmly believe in and your significant other should see eye-to-eye on. Questions such as “what is your religion?” should be brought up early in a relationship. You need to ask your significant other questions that will help you learn about how your partner plays, works and runs his life.

  • What is your greatest wish for your partner?
  • Is that one of your goals or aspirations?
  • Do you like to clean or do you expect your spouse to do all of the work?
  • Do you prefer to be the only breadwinner in the family, or are you okay with your spouse make more money than you do?

Sexual Preferences

Even though it can be a hard topic to talk about, sex and sexuality can play a large role in a person’s relationship and marriage. Sexuality is simply a way that humans communicate and share with one another without the use of words. One of the deepest questions you can ask your significant other is whether or not you will have intercourse prior to marriage. You need to ask your spouse what he finds sexually attractive in you. Being able to talk about sex with your partner will only bring you and your significant other closer together.

Finding out how your significant other views you is the best way to keep the line of communication open and learn whether you will be compatible. Ask him if he views you as selfish or close-minded. Maybe he sees you as open and giving, or maybe he sees something else. By asking deep questions, you can learn how many children he wants or what type of house he would like to live in. Asking questions won’t always help you with judging your compatibility, because many answers can change over time. People do change, so there is not a guarantee that you will always be compatible, but in general, knowing your beliefs, knowing your differences, and knowing your sexual preferences are things that rarely change.

 

Deep Questions to Ask a Girl

deep questions to ask a girlRelationships can sometimes be challenging, but they don’t have to be. Getting to know the woman you are dating should be fun and rewarding. There is a right way to get to know someone and a wrong way. Remember that everyone has a past, and experiences are a big part of what makes us who we are. Spending time with someone is a great way to get to know them and asking questions shows you are interested in finding out who they really are and what makes them tick. Here are some great questions to ask a girl.

Most women don’t want to give up too much personal information on a first date but are happy to exchange stories about themselves as they get to know someone better. Some simple questions to ask would be about their family life, siblings, education, likes and dislikes, and maybe past relationships. As time goes on and two people get more acquainted with one another, they will look for more interesting and intriguing information.

More intricate questions will reveal personality traits about a person and cause you to be more attracted to them. The answers you get may also be a complete turn off, so be prepared for the answers you seek. Some deep questions to ask a girl could be:

  • What is one thing you would change about your past if you could?
  • What is something about you that very few people know?
  • What would you do if you were stranded on a dark desert highway?

Not everyone likes to talk about religion and politics, so it is best to steer clear of that subject unless they bring it up. The answers to situational questions such as what would you do or would you rather will reveal a great deal about a person’s strength and determination.

Deep Questions to Ask Your Girlfriend

Once two people have been dating for some time and it has been established that they are a couple, things need to escalate to the next level both mentally and emotionally. All of the getting to know you stuff has been addressed. Their past and who they are has been revealed but what about their future? There are some deep questions to ask your girlfriend that will help to prepare for a future together if that is where the relationship is headed.

Do you want to have children and how many would you like to have is an excellent question and subject to address. It is perfectly acceptable to ask about her past sex life or how many men she has had physical relationships with. If the couple is past the point of intimacy, asking about what turns a girl on in the bedroom is an acceptable question and can be an invitation to foreplay. Another great question would be: are you able to accept people for who they are, even though their faults are obvious?

Asking questions that go beyond the physical existence of a relationship lets a woman know that you are capable of having a grown up relationship that is not based solely on sex. Remember that asking deep questions about a person’s life and lifestyle may prompt them to respond by asking their own deep questions about you. Be ready to share something about yourself in exchange.

Good Questions to Ask Guys

There is no doubt that men and women live on separate planets when it comes to communication and thought processes. Experts say that women speak considerably more words than men do on a daily basis. Often, women have to drag the words out of men to get any kind of answer, but there are some ways a woman can improve communication by planning some good questions to ask a guy. By thinking out the questions first, it gives them not only a way to start a conversation but allows the woman a way to get to know the man. Here are a few you can try.

What do you like to do on the weekends?

When a woman first meets a guy, they want to keep the conversation light. If the woman digs too deep too fast, then the guy starts feeling like the woman is being too nosy and may tend to back away. By asking general questions at the beginning, the woman is learning information about the man but not scaring him off. It is an open-ended question, so the guy has to respond back with some of his favorite hobbies. This can give the woman an idea of what is important to the guy outside of his work.

What is one of your biggest pet peeves?

As the man and woman get to know each other better, the woman can start asking harder questions. Some questions to ask guys can be related to their dislikes. This lets the woman know what turns the man off, so she can avoid this behavior or action in the future. The answer can also tell the woman if the guy is more laid-back or more on the uptight side. If the woman possibly wants a relationship from this guy in the near future, it can be a great way to find out how he approaches a situation he does not like.

Why did your last relationship end?

This is a big question and should only be used if the conversation is headed into a deeper mood. A woman would only want to ask this question if there is a possibility that the guy is into her and may want a relationship with her. If the conversation is strictly platonic and casual, the woman would want to keep the questions lighter. When asking this question, the woman can learn how the guy may handle relationships and what to expect out him. If his previous relationship ended over something trivial, she may want to think harder before getting into a relationship with this guy. The answer the guy gives can also tell her how serious this guy is when it comes to relationships.

When you want to get to know someone better, you often have to not only ask questions, but ask deeper questions to really learn something about the person. Guys are known to keep things in and give short answers, but by asking the right questions, you can expect some great answers. When asking questions, a guy’s posture and mannerisms can also give you personal information about him. Getting to know someone is imperative before jumping into a relationship. By asking the right questions ahead of time, you can save a lot of heartbreak in the end.

 

Awesome Conversation Topics for Couples

Conversation-Topics-for-CouplesFor many couples, the beginning stages of the relationship are the most fun as each person is still learning new and exciting things about each other. However, once the relationship has reached a certain point, usually once the relationship has been steady for a while, it can be hard to find that fun and excitement feeling again. This is why it is important to always have interesting conversation topics so that the relationship stays alive and fun for both people. Here are some sample conversation topics for you.

1. If you could be anybody, who would you choose to be?

This is a great question to ask because this allows you to see what your partner sees him or herself as. Everybody has multiple icons or role models, and it’s likely that your partner will try to be like that person. By asking this question, you can learn more about your partner’s personality and what makes him or her “tick.” You might just be surprised by what your partner says!

2. If you were granted three wishes, what would you wish for?

This is definitely one of the oldest questions in the book, but it really does tell what a person truly wants or wishes for. When this question is asked, you are able to see what sort of ambition or dreams your partner desires. Depending on what he or she wishes for, you can try to make their wishes become reality. Pay close attention to the answers of this question as it is a great way to tell what your partner wants in life.

3. What is the scariest thing that has ever happened to you?

Asking this question may involve some deep thinking from your partner, but usually anyone can answer this question in a matter of seconds simply because such memories tend to stick out like a sore thumb. When you ask this question, you are able to see the vulnerability of your partner and learn the secrets to providing comfort to him or her.

4. What is the weirdest thing you have ever eaten?

Depending on the person, this question can definitely be a fun one to ask. It definitely involve a sense of humor or a sincere answer, and most likely it’s an answer you would have rather not known! This is a fun and quirky topic out of many conversation topics for couples, but it definitely ensures a good laugh.

5. What would you do with a million bucks?

Just about everyone secretly wishes for a million dollars. And it’s fun to see what people would do with that kind of money. By asking this question, you can learn how they would deal with money and see what type of financial choices he or she would make.

There many conversation topics for couples and depending on the complexity and length of the relationship, the topics and questions will differ. Factor in where your relationship stands and what is appropriate. Start learning new and exciting things about your partner; you may be surprised with the answers!

Relationship Questions to Ask

relationship questions to askThe start of a relationship is exciting and rather fun, and asking the right questions can add to the excitement. It’s important to get to know the other person very well before making any life altering or permanent decisions. The beginning of a relationship will be different for each person, but there are key relationship questions you can ask to make sure the partnership is going in the right direction as well as to learn essential information about your partner or potential partner. Although some of these questions are quite common, they are still vital to ask in every relationship.

What kind of activities or hobbies do you enjoy doing?

Although this is a basic question, it is important to ask. This will help you determine if you and the other individual have any common interests. Even if the answer isn’t what you are looking for, many say that opposites extract. It is really up to the person asking the question to see whether or not the other person fits their ideal mold of a partner. If the interests are vast and widely different, then it may not be best to move forward, but it is definitely your call to make. This question can also lead to many other conversations as you learn about what the other person enjoys and is interested in.

What are your views on religion/politics?

There are some people out there who claim that those two topics play no part in their relationship and although that can be considered true for some, it is still a greatly debated subject among many couples. It’s important that both individuals in the relationship agree on some points as well as disagree on others. When the disagreements outweigh the agreements, it doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship won’t work. It depends on how both parters feel about their beliefs and whether they can be respectful and open to beliefs that differ from their own. Remember to respect your partner’s beliefs and expect to receive the same in return.

Where do you see yourself in 5 years?

This is definitely a question that many have been asked, whether it is by their partners, school teachers, on job interviews, or by parents. It’s an important question to ask and consider, as it allows each person to carefully think of where they see their life in the next 5 years. When you ask this question, you are able to determine the ambition of the individual and see if the pair of you are heading into the right direction. Be sure to understand your partner’s answers and ask additional questions as needed.

Not only are these great relationship questions to ask, they can also be considered good starter questions as well. These questions are open-ended, so you will hopefully receive an interesting, well-thought out answer and not the typical yes or no. Also, these questions allow you to learn more about your partner or potential partner. A relationship requires work from both people, so be prepared when your partner asks the same questions to you. It is important to take each question seriously and to even ask them seriously as well. It will ensure that you will receive honest answers.

Conversation Questions for Couples

conversation questions for couplesFor most couples, the beginning stages set the foundation for how the rest of the relationship will play out. Learning about each other early and asking the necessary questions is vital to a healthy and open relationship. Also, it’s never too late to start fresh if the relationship is past the “honeymoon stage.” Conversation questions for couples will allow each person in the relationship to express their true feelings and rekindle the passion for one another.

The main dilemma with many couples is what sort of questions to ask and how to approach their partner when asking such questions. This shouldn’t be a time of nervousness or uncertainty. You are interested in the person, so the questions should be focused on learning more about him or her. Perhaps this is the reason why so many relationships tend to die out because the necessary work isn’t involved. Within a relationship, it is important to keep it lively and entertaining.

In order to keep a relationship fresh, each person within the relationship needs to put forth 100 percent effort. Tension will grow, and if one person within the relationships starts to feel taken advantage of or mistreated, then obviously the entire relationship will suffer. If your relationship sounds like this, then know that this is the perfect time to start things over. Just learning more about each other can do wonders because often, the people within the relationship change over time, and it takes asking questions to reset the foundation within the relationship.

Learning how to communicate with each other, especially if the relationship is brand new or even when the relationship has been steady for a while is vital to the relationship’s livelihood. Conversation starters are an easy and effective way to start a discussion with your partner. Each question will depend on your current relationship’s status, but some specific questions for couples to use are:

  • What are you thinking of at this very moment?
  • Is there one thing in your life you wish you could change? If so, what is it and why?
  • What are your plans today and how are you going to accomplish them?
  • What is one thing nobody knows about you?
  • How are you truly feeling?
  • What is something you dream about doing?

These questions were chosen because they require more than a yes or no answer and usually, it’s an answer that requires more than a one sentence answer. This is precisely what conversation starters are; instead of feeling forced to talk to your significant other, it allows you to seek out the truth and shows genuine care.

Again, the questions will vary based on the status of your relationship. Usually, conversation starters are primarily for those individuals who have just started a relationship; however, even a relationship that is considered “old” can still gain so much insight from just starting over and asking basic questions. People and feelings change, and the best way to keep the relationship afloat is to bring out those feelings of change often. There is no reason to keep everything bottled up inside, so begin a conversation with your partner simply by asking “how is your day?”